Archive | December, 2011

Man Of The House/Promise Ready

26 Dec

As I went over the details of my last blog and realized, that a situation that could have been a tragedy, God took and molded it into a cocoon for my growth as well as my son’s. He also took what could have been a dead situation and preserved the life of it, to show what it looks like when one man steps out, How God in a timely fashion steps right in.

Often it is far too long dwelled on, what is leaving that we miss God. He comes right by and we miss him. We have this idea about what we think is right and how things should be, that we hold people in places in our lives, that we don’t see how they arrived, just to depart. And in most situations a baby is made before the departure.

This brought me to the story of Hagar and Ishmael.(Genesis 16) She would be labeled as the first mentioned “baby mama” in the bible. In my words it would be the first single mother, until I can go over “baby mama” with you, perhaps in another entry. Her pregnancy came about in a strange scenario. Abraham’s wife, suggested that he take her for his wife so that they could get a family started. After Abraham heard from God over and over and over the promise that He made to him.  He kept listening to what the woman, “his wife” was saying. That sounds very familiar (like Adam and Eve). Part of me wants to believe that he just got tired of his wife’s mouth and decided to give her what she wanted. The other part of me, that is wiser and can’t ignore being raised around a host of males in my family, that has slightly tapped into the male psyche tells me that Hagar was a younger, possibly more physically fit (because of her work), Egyptian woman. But who can really say.

Abraham marries Hagar, before he goes to bed with her.

He married her, before he even slept with her. He didn’t go to bed with her, before making her his wife. Where they do that at?

The only problem with marrying Hagar, is that wasn’t the Word that was given to him from God. It was from his wife. So taking the right steps in a wrong situation will not get you any credit. Anyway this is not about Abraham right now, as much as it is about Hagar.

If you read on she gets pregnant and tries to run away. But as soon as she does, an Angel of God met her with instructions. Along with going back , God told her that she was pregnant. And the name of the son that she would have. Ishmael.

It was after the baby was born and well in age, that they wouldn’t expect anything more from God or consider improvising anymore, that God changed their names, for the promise. Then they became Abraham and Sarah. Before they were Abram and Sarai.

A lot of people don’t realize how God is big on name changes. To establish something new. Being so worried about dropping a name that was given to you at birth, you miss what God is trying to call you according to His purpose. Establish through the name that he wants to give you. Some names can’t go with you to your destinies. There are names that plague people, yet they hold on to them, because of who named them and whose name it is.

That was the first time that God met her, during her pregnancy. To let her know she’s pregnant, the babies gender and what she would name him.

There is another time after the original promise that God made to Abraham comes to pass and he and his wife Sarah are blessed with their son Isaac. Hagar is sent away. By Abraham. God gives Abraham this job for a reason. Ishmael was not the promise for the covenant that God would make through Abraham’s offspring. But to Abraham he was still his son and it bothered him to have a son he know he gave life to walking around uncovered by his blessing. And to send him away.

The story of Abraham is one of if not the best story on faith in the bible. How he takes Isaac in a mind made up frame of mind to do what God told him to do, which is kill him. He didn’t hesitate in any of his steps. That’s a big job, and you have to be a man firm in God to carry out the order, trusting in God, the entire time.  He only stopped when he heard God calling to him, letting him know there was a ram in the bush.

Before Abraham would have to sacrifice his son Isaac, the child that God’s promise would come through, he first sacrificed his son Ishmael to God. God told him to send them away both he and his mother, like his wife was telling him. Distressed as he was, he did it. He obeyed.

To me in this scenario it seems is when God would establish his paternity on earth for children who do not have their fathers. He would be the father in unintended situations. Our mistakes, His miracles. What was special about Ishmael is that even though he was not the son in which God’s covenant would be established for generations to come, he was still under the blessing. For those who would believe. And aside from that God said that Ishmael would be a great nation as well. (That is something every single mother should be excited about). Where God is the man of the house and the Father of your children. A great nation. That’s information that people wouldn’t voluntarily tell you, that you would have to search to find.

Why would they tell single mothers, on government assistance that they are over a great nation of people. The stories often tell themselves. Many a great leaders come from single mother households. It’s not news. Apparently according to Hagar’s story women can be single mothers even if they are married.

Single mothers are often head bowed, feeling shameful, singled out, disgraced, embarrassed. Acting as if they need to apologize. Quiet about their situations. Not bragging and boasting their children. When there is a not man in the picture to help frame the idea of family.

As for me, I always knew that my children would be special. Because I felt like I am. Not for any reason, talent or skill in particular. I just remember feeling like I’m somebody important. Even though I was shy, quiet and had a bad attitude. I always knew that my children would be special. No matter the circumstances they were born from.

This story makes me wonder,why do God let us, watch us, mess up and then save us? Why not save us before we mess up.

Something tells me that from the time that Adam and Eve did their own thing God knew for certain what free willed man was capable of. And from then on He was going to make it a point of turning our mistakes for making His miracles.

What Abraham went through with Ishmael was helping him to get ready for God’s test in getting him the promise. Even though there was real pain it didn’t go on in vain. Unacknowledged. It helped Abraham to better trust God. To just do as He says.

> Abraham could have lost his faith and gave up ever wanting a promise when his first son Ishmael was taken from him. He could have lost sight of everything and just plain out lost his mind.

> When he realized that Ishmael wasn’t the promise of God, it wasn’t enough. He had come too far not to have the whole promise of God. Therefore he sacrificed his son Ishmael to God.


There are two lessons to learn in this story:

One is that whenever a man steps out of a situation God will step in. Often it does not happen until everything that someone else gave to help and to say they helped runs out that God will be able to open your eyes to see what He has for you. (It wasn’t until Hagar and Ishmael were wandering in the desert and ran out of the wineskins of water that Abraham provided them with that God opened her eyes to show that he was providing for them.

(another story that could compare with this is the story of Saul and how he was rejected as king by God for not being obedient. what happens when God makes you King and then rejects you? )

(One quote in that text I hear Christian people overuse and misuse is “to do what is right is better than sacrifice” to do what is right does not mean what’s right in the eyes of everybody else, according to what their years of church attendance think is right. But to obey God. Obedience. Even when it makes you look crazy.)

Going on,

The second lesson is that getting ready for the promise comes with pain, heartache, tears, fears and more. The promise is rarely just handed. Especially since the beginning when everything that was given was taken for granted. Therefore God saw it better that man would take care of what He gives them if he works for it. Jacob worked and ran and wrestled with God before he was blessed.

Abraham didn’t let his mistakes make him falter in his faith and trusting God. That’s why he was ready for the promise of God even after all the hardships he put himself through, he believed God.


As for Hagar and Ishmael the bible says that God was with the boy as he grew up. He was the one providing all the time and when God provides it does not run out. He was the man of the house and the father to His son.