Final Destination: My Destiny

26 Aug

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 If the sun won’t shine today
I feel like I have to
Trying to reflect the hope I know
A promise that reveals He’s faithful

Everything in oppositon
Pushing me to give in

Telling me this will never end

I can’t win

For me to be such a small woman

I wonder how my enemies are two 6 ft. something, sized men. (?)

The only way out
Is to fall down
I thought I was already there before
As long as I live
They come to attack me some more
What’s the point of being strong
When you’re all alone,

I’ve weighed it all in my head
The truth I discovered
Is that your attackers, your enemies
Want to torment you
Until you’re  dead

I’m too beautiful to fall
Into the hands of those
Who have dug their own holes
Trying to bring me down

Thinking they know what’s ahead for me
Trying to keep me from my crown

Golden.
Pain is there. Still, I’m glowing.
Each day I’m here.
Chosen at birth, I choose to keep going.

Nobody to cheer me on
To listen & hear what I’m going through
Years, tears and my fears trying to rest with me
No end in sight
I know this wants to get the best of me
Thinking time matters to me, I am my own destiny

In case they never heard it like this
I am the Promise, the Purpose
without me, there’s no them
Their lives are worthless
Purposeless
While they get dressed, rehearse and choose a church pulpit
To get a message of the verses I already came with
That I was made with.

So if the sun’s not shining
And the skies not crying
Am I to become one of the
Flowers I see around me
with no power
Dying on the inside
And then physically
For the world to go on
As if it never needed me

When I look at me
I know I see
What no one can see
What no one can ever be.

No pressure
From this day
To explain my grace
I just move on to the next one
In grace
My life for what it is now
Embraced
My smile and radiance
Never erased
While you carry baggage and overweight
I carry one, you could never keep up with my pace

While I rise
Just keep your eyes
Focused on my demise
Something you can never devise
Once at the top
I’ve reached the beginning of my life
While you settle into yours the way it’s been

I’ll be out of your reach then.

You should have treated, honored and cherished us better when……
Did I say us? So I’m not alone, just because u think you’ve made it that way.

It’s OK.
I can’t keep entertaining my footstools
As if they’re my pedestals.

When the fat lady begins to sing
And you look up to see your opponent
The one your fighting
And realize you’re not the king
They’ll say you lost a war you started with this woman & her son because she didn’t settle for you and wear your ring.

But we all are champions?

Just like we all are stars?

You’re not. It wasn’t in your cards.

But we are. 🙂

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One Response to “Final Destination: My Destiny”

  1. acidwashedjeans August 26, 2015 at 2:07 am #

    Lots of depth here. It’s jaded – but with that it is honest and beautiful. I enjoyed reading it. From the heart you can’t go wrong.

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